Hawaiian Lava Flows

While my husband and I were engaged I did a semester of school in Hawaii with my good friend Natalie, while he stayed on the mainland to work. We didn't have a car in Hawaii, so the bus had to get us wherever we wanted to go.

(Nothing like riding the bus to make you feel like an adult, let me tell you.)

Natalie and I used to sit on the side of the road by the bus stop and call the bus hotline to find out 'how many more minutes' until the bus would arrive. (That always made me feel pretty adult-like as well.)

Anyway, we'd hop the bus and ride it down to Turtle Bay Resort/Hotel.  And then we would head to the pool.

Errr... by taking the back gate.  And walking very stealthily.  And perhaps wearing swimsuit coverups that matched nearby shrubbery. 

But once we we'd snuck in we'd get to lay out, slap on some Maui Babe tanning lotion and drink in the Hawaii sun.

We'd always get asked for drink orders and I'd wonder which room I should charge it to.

(Just kidding.  But kind of not.)

Turns out if you're white, they assume you're a resort guest.  And they let you lay by the pool.  Every. Day.  And apparently they think you live there because how else do they not notice that you never. go. away.    ??

Probably they thought I was Paris Hilton or something and just live at hotels.



I eavesdropped on so many great conversations at that pool.

Don't pretend you don't do it.

How can you not listen to the details of a six-year-old's birthday party that totaled almost 12,000 dollars?

It's like a train-wreck, you just can't look away. Also, apparently if you're wearing earbuds people think you're not listening.

Who knew?

Anyway, since I was SO moral-minded and just couldn't bring myself to order lots of drinks to other people's rooms, I never got to taste Turtle Bay's Hawaiian Lava flow.

But I so wanted to.

So Turtle Bay resort, here's to you.

Thanks for the great tan for my wedding.  The relaxation. And some priceless gems of wisdom.

("OMGOSH... do not EVER hire her to do your balloons. She brought shiny teal instead of iridescent aqua and she used trashy ribbon! The floats were ALL wrong, I think her sister is transgender and I heard she got her dog from the pound!")


This "Real Housewives" stuff?  It's for real.

 

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Thin Mint Truffle Brownies

Truffle brownies are the brain-child of Dorothy over at Crazy for Crust.  I decided to make a Thin Mint version the other day and it was the best decision I made this week. 

(The worst decision I made was texting while on the treadmill at a 9.5 incline. Forget texting and driving, they need a PSA for that.)

My mom can't stop talking about how these are the perfect brownie, so you can take that as a good sign.  She's something of a brownie connoisseur, so you can trust her.

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Chocolate-Covered Strawberry Cupcakes

Pinterest is great because it introduces me to things I desperately need.

Like,

This sink faucet that changes colors according to temperature  (but you can pretend the red is fruit punch if you want.)

This rock climbing wall for my house.  (For when dinner guests get bored)

This Disney castle mural (Because $3600 is a cheap price to pay for that kind of magic.)

Also this pirate ship playground because then I could probably have the house all to myself.  All 3 of my boys would surely live on it.  Including my husband.

Something else you desperately need?

Chocolate-covered strawberry cupcakes.

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Chocolate-dipped Chips Ahoy Ice Cream Sandwiches (and a 4th of July version)

I am currently trying to think of a good scheme that would convince my husband to buy me a dog.


Like plastering this face all over the house:

Probably two hundred-ish copies or so would do.


If I had a dog I would never have to sweep my wood floors again because everyone knows dogs are human vacuum cleaners.  This means no more crumbs people. No. More. Crumbs!!

Have you seen my floor?

I swept that yesterday.  

As in, one meal ago. 

Also, if I had a dog I could go "walking" in my neighborhood without looking like a moron, because my pace would obviously be a result of my dog's short legs and not my lack of coordination or physical fitness.  Walking a dog is the only acceptable way to walk around the neighborhood when you're 26.  If you're 50+ you can do whatever the heck you want.  But 26 year olds can't just go "walking" by themselves.  People expect you to at least jog or something.  This of course, I am not willing to do in broad daylight.

Also, most importantly, if I had a dog it would  function as a guard dog to scare away kidnappers and murderers when I'm home alone at night.  Probably a more effective deterrent than me wearing a hockey mask around and peering through the back windows at intervals.  (Kidnappers and murderers leave other kidnappers and murderers alone you see.  And they ALWAYS watch your house for at least an hour before busting in, so this is actually a great method. You really should invest in a hockey mask if you haven't already. Talking REALLY loudly next to your windows about your loaded gun also helps.)

All I see is positives here.

Plus, probably dogs clean up ice cream drips.  Which I will need for the next time I make these:

Let me know if you know of any place that does color copies in bulk.

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Fourth of July Firework Pushpops

I've had firework pushpops on the brain since last summer when I ran out of time to make them amidst the craziness of moving.  Unfortunately, a few months ago I saw this idea by Betty Crocker, so I had to accept the reality that I won't go down in history as the inventor of the firework push pop.

Rats.

There's probably billions in that.


However, while their pops are cute, they weren't exactly what I had imagined. Fireworks need pointy cones on top and streamers coming out the bottom!

I kept their color scheme and added some extras and I am happy with how they turned out.


Unrelated- My kids are going to think it's bizarre when they start school and realize all their friends don't have holiday-themed treats packed in their lunchboxes weeks before the actual holiday.

#bloggermomproblems#

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Double Birthday Cupcakes (Decorating technique)

Last week I made these cupcakes for my sister-in-law and dear friend Becky (and the BEST mom to twins everrr) for her birthday.

Sometimes recipes like this from Pinterest just keep nagging at me until I make them.

Also I won't ever say no to a reason to buy a whole bag of mini peanut butter cups.



These are super fast and easy and you can use any cupcakes or frosting you like.  Plus they're almost husband friendly.

(As in... there's only so many ways to screw up putting a peanut butter cup on top of a cupcake and adding sprinkles. So you can totally request these for your birthday.)

Did I mention you get to eat all the extra peanut butter cups?

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Palm Tree Sugar Cookies

Since I had some dough left over from from the dinosaur fossil sugar cookies, and since my mom left a box of malted milk balls in my fridge (darn you mom!), these seemed like a good way to greet summer. 

Also, hanging out at the park in 50 degree weather.

Nothing says summer like wearing a hoodie.

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Dinosaur Fossil Sugar Cookies (Basic Sugar Cookie Recipe)

Boys are weird.  I have lots of evidence to back this claim up but the most relevant is that they enjoy eating cookies with reptile footprints in them.

Weeeeeeeeiiiird.

This is a great basic sugar cookie recipe. The cookies don't spread much so they are perfect to use with cookie cutters and they taste great with or without frosting.

Dinosaur footprints are, of course, optional. 

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Key Lime Pie Cupcakes

Key lime pie is kind of sacred in our house. We happen to be related to this famous author that used to drink a LOT and liked to jump around between women.  (Sorry...I don't really know how else to describe him.) He also used to spend winters in Key West drinking and writing.  We have been down there a few times and have taken pictures in front of  'Uncle Ernie's'  house and tried to steal some of the remaining 6-toed cats at his house.  (Since we're related and all I'm pretty sure they should just hand 'em over but apparently the island disagrees.) 

Anyways, Key West of course is famous for key lime pie.  So key lime pie is kind of like the symbolic family dessert.  (If I had been in charge of the Hemingway coat of arms it would, of course, have Key Lime pie in the middle.  Derr.)

Anyways, wanna know a secret? 

I actually kind of hate key lime pie.  

Key limes are bitter and WAY too tart and kinda gross.  (Don't tell anyone though because not liking the family dessert would obviously kicked out of the family.)

One thing I do like- these Key Lime pie cupcakes.  There's just enough tart filling to be yummy and powerful but it's surrounded by a sweet cake and a delicious graham cracker crust and topped with whipped cream.  Everyone wins here.  These are REALLY delicious.

PS- Totally off topic, but Key West has this great place called the Key Lime Pie Factory.  They sell pieces of frozen key lime pie, dipped in chocolate, and served on a stick like a popsicle.  *swoon*.   Put it on your bucket list.

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Chocolate-dipped Dinosaur Rice Krispy Treat Pops

My 4 year old has been out of  "school" for 2 weeks now and so far he has:  asked for 10 million snacks, made a coral reef out of marshmallows and licorice, corrected his grandmother's grammar (further and farther are NOT the same word),  and eaten every single meal in his treehouse.

I'm thinking it's going to be a long summer.

I have some fun science/social studies "units" planned for him to keep us from rotting of boredom, so I'll have some themed foods coming all summer, but there will also be plenty of the usual.

This week we are starting a dinosaur unit.  If I had realized this would entail long conversations about carrion and how carnivores shred their meat I probably wouldn't have been so eager to start with this one.  At any rate we had a great time making these pops and I have some super cute dino-themed cookies to share with you later.

Happy Summer to all!

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